Who He Was

I know his name. I know his face. I know his scent. I know his quirks. Yet I still do not know who he is. However, I can tell you who he was. He was my best friend. My love. My confidant. He was the man who quashed all my fears and insecurities when he put his arms around me. He was a dedicated employee who rarely complained about work. He was devoted to his friends. He was the man who ensured me I would be a good mother. He was loyal, smart, and funny as hell. He loved HBO, German Shepherds, and time at the gym. He was obsessed with his Sonicare toothbrush and protein powders. He took pride in his appearance, his wardrobe, his physique. He would shy away when I would comment on how handsome he was. He was the man who sent me flowers on Valentine's Day and promised me I would never have a February 14th without them. He was my everything.

He was all of these things, and yet he was the man who left his new bride two weeks before their one year wedding anniversary. He was the man who made me feel lonely, even when he was in the room. He was the man who began acting like a bachelor while he was still married. He was the man who strung me along for months, making empty promises of reconciliation. He was the man who prioritized his selfish hobbies and former frat bros in front of his wife. He was the man who listened to me confess my deep depression and simply blank stared me. He was the man who watched me sob on the floor, and walked out of the room.